What do you do whenever you really feel just like the partitions are closing in on you and you may barely breathe since you’re so harassed? In case you’re like me, your pure tendency is to revert to issues that aren’t essentially going that can assist you in the long term; perhaps stress consuming or overworking. Every of us has a pure place we go to once we’re harassed, but it surely isn’t often the perfect place. It takes much more work for us to breathe after which work on the healthiest approach to handle stress. However ultimately, giving ourselves the precise instruments to succeed will assist us get the true comfort we actually want.
In right this moment’s article, we’re taking a look at what the Enneagram varieties are likely to do after they’re overwhelmed, after which what they ought to do as an alternative to get out from below power overwhelm or stress. Let’s get began!
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What You Want When You’re Overwhelmed, Primarily based On Your Enneagram Sort
Estimated studying time: 21 minutes
Enneagram 1 and Overwhelm
The very first thing Ones are likely to do when stress begins to rise is to handle the scenario. They attempt to management all of the shifting items in order that they’ll get every part proper and resolve the stress that they’re feeling. But when this doesn’t repair something, or if stress continues for a very long time, they’ll disintegrate to 4. This appears just like the One immediately withdrawing, turning into melancholy, self-absorbed, and feeling misunderstood and deserted by the world. Throughout this time they might have fantasies a few rescuer who might present up and save them from their ache; somebody who would lastly perceive them and see all of the arduous work they’re doing and take among the burden off their shoulders.
What Ones Ought to Do As a substitute:
There’s nothing flawed with getting emotional or feeling melancholy or taking just a few moments to mourn the scenario you’re in. However what Ones actually ought to do after they’re overwhelmed is attempt to combine some points of the Seven into their lives. Take some deep breaths, clench and unclench your fingers, jaw, shoulders, legs, any physique half you possibly can. Soar round and loosen up your limbs. When you’ve acquired your physique in a greater area, then take into consideration some methods you possibly can loosen up and loosen up emotionally. It might really feel counterintuitive to your hard-working One nature, however this half is so essential. Ones who combine 7 into their lives are usually extra glad, accepting, content material, and affordable.
Methods to Cut back Overwhelm and Combine Seven Into Your Life:
· Watch a film or TV present that makes you giggle
· Take heed to music and dance like no person’s watching
· Go exterior and take a stroll in nature
· Discuss to a good friend and make a plan to do one thing enjoyable and leisurely (mini golf, a film, ice cream, impromptu street journey!)
· Play a recreation that will get you out of your head and right into a happier headspace
· Write down the issues which are making you harassed, then put them apart whilst you do one thing enjoyable. This fashion you already know you possibly can come again to them later so that you don’t must mentally maintain on to them whilst you do one thing else.
Discover out extra about Ones: The Enneagram 1 Baby
Enneagram 2 and Overwhelm
The very first thing Twos are likely to do after they expertise stress is attempt to discover acknowledgement and comfort from others. They really feel extra insecure than typical and need to really feel linked, liked, and wanted of their relationships. But when stress continues or leads to some extent of full overwhelm, they’ll flip a change and change into extra like unhealthy Eights. When this occurs, they change into extra passive-aggressive, irritable, offended, and reactive. They push themselves tougher, battle towards anybody making an attempt to step in and handle the scenario, and begin to really feel rage in direction of individuals who they really feel have taken them with no consideration. In these moments they might blow up and vent all their anger on the very individuals they’ve labored so arduous to deal with and be there for. Many instances this could really feel like an uncontrollable, out of physique expertise.
“When immature Twos are harm, they’ll immediately cease being candy and pliant and present their claws. At such moments they’re able to doing frightful damage to the very individual they supposedly love above all.” – Richard Rohr and Andreas Ebert, The Enneagram: A Christian Perspective
What Twos Ought to Do As a substitute:
The very first thing that each Enneagram sort ought to do is attempt to get their physique in a greater area. When stress is flooding your physique, it’s actually tough to modify to a more healthy headspace till you’re bodily feeling higher. Strive some of those deep respiration strategies to calm your physique and cut back the circulation of stress. Stretch your muscle tissues. Shake every part out.
When you’ve gotten your physique to a greater place, take into consideration methods you possibly can combine among the 4 Enneatype into your life. As a Two you naturally deal with others, typically abandoning your self to what different individuals want. Overwhelm could be a purple flag, warning you to get again in contact with your self. When a Two integrates 4 into their lives, they change into extra self-aware, happy, smart, and insightful. You see, Twos are likely to repress their very own wants and mission them onto others. This may seem like not giving themselves relaxation after they’re sick, however ensuring that others get loads of relaxation. When Twos combine 4, they have to face themselves and their wants and their true motivations. That is one of the simplest ways to search out true comfort for the Two.
Methods to Cut back Overwhelm and Combine 4 Into Your Life:
· Write down your true emotions in a journal (don’t think about anybody else studying it)
· Get some paints, pencils, or different numerous artwork provides and take a look at drawing your emotions or the occasions surrounding them
· Take heed to music that resonates with how you are feeling
· Write a listing of issues that make you content and aren’t reliant on anybody else
· Watch a film you want, with out worrying about what different individuals need to watch
· Remind your self that your emotions are simply as essential as anybody else’s
· Let your self have a great cry
· After some reflection, discuss to somebody actually about what your wants are and ask for assist.
Uncover extra about Twos: 10 Indicators of an Unhealthy Enneagram 2
Enneagram 3 and Overwhelm
The very first thing Threes do after they expertise stress is attempt to take cost and handle every part. This may seem like looking for sensible options, engaged on tasks till they’re completed even when these tasks are monumental, or discovering shortcuts to unravel the problems with out actually analyzing them in depth. They all the time need to seem competent, like they’ve acquired all of it collectively and are completely unflappable. Due to this, they usually refuse to ask for assist and should keep away from admitting they’re struggling in any respect. Or they might immediately stop relationships or commitments that they really feel are usually not serving to them or are bringing down their stage of success.
If stress continues or mounts to some extent of full overwhelm, Threes could disintegrate to 9. All of a sudden they flip a change, put on out, and change into withdrawn, disinterested, and listless. Moderately than showing lively and power like they often do, they appear empty, drained, and unmotivated. They could let their look deteriorate, spend hours watching tv or scrolling on their telephones, or withdraw from society in a state of exhaustion.
What Threes Ought to Do As a substitute:
As with all of the Enneagram varieties, it’s essential for Threes to get in contact with their physique and bodily loosen up and discover peace. This may seem like deep respiration, training progressive muscle rest, or leaping round, dancing, and loosening up.
As soon as the Three is feeling much less harassed bodily, they should take a while to combine some wholesome Six attributes into their lives. Most common Threes are very picture centered; they work themselves arduous to attain the looks of competence and achievement. As soon as Threes cease worrying a lot about their look and take extra time to deal with causes larger than themselves, they begin to discover lasting peace and satisfaction. For the Six, this implies being a part of a neighborhood and sticking with it by means of thick and skinny. Turning into extra centered on larger values, ideas, and causes which are past themselves permits Threes to completely embody their strengths of resilience, productiveness, and innovation. This may take the super burden of feat and searching profitable off their shoulders and assist them really feel linked, significant, and really content material.
Methods to Cut back Overwhelm and Combine Six Into Your Life:
· Make a listing of issues that matter to you which are fully unrelated to your efficiency or look
· Remind your self of who’s there for you, no matter how effectively you carry out or what you seem like
· Discuss to somebody who really cares about you, and be trustworthy about what you’re going by means of
· Volunteer for a trigger that issues to you and offers you a way of which means and goal
· Discuss to a counselor who may also help you kind out underlying feelings
· Take a stroll in nature and take into consideration how you’re linked to nature and the way all life is interdependent
· Consider the values that lie past your self and discover small, significant methods to contribute to these values
Discover out extra about Threes: Escaping the Lure of Vainness for Enneagram Threes
Enneagram 4 and Overwhelm
When Fours first start to expertise stress, they have a tendency to withdraw and retreat into melancholy. They could attempt to course of their emotions, get in contact with what’s motivating them or discover a artistic avenue to specific their emotions. If stress continues or reaches a state of full overwhelm, they might disintegrate to Two. When this occurs they change into extra centered on how others really feel about them, making a great impression, being wanted, confiding in others, feeling linked and liked. This may devolve into turning into needy, giving up their very own independence, or making an attempt to assist and make themselves indispensable, however in a means that’s neither useful to them or the opposite individual.
What Fours Ought to Do As a substitute:
First, Fours ought to deal with calming their physique and decreasing the push of stress that’s in all probability inflicting loads of pressure and jitters all by itself. This implies training deep respiration, progressive muscle rest, or going for a fast jog or a stroll exterior to assist the physique discover its personal calm.
As soon as the 4 is feeling bodily in a greater area, it’s time to start out integrating some points of the wholesome One into their lives. This implies specializing in values, diligence, and objectivity, relatively than getting overwhelmed with a wave of destructive emotions that would lead them right into a pit of despair or immobility.
Methods to Cut back Overwhelm and Combine One Into Your Life:
- Keep in mind that emotions are usually not all the time details. Take into consideration issues that may very well be impacting your temper (tiredness, starvation, climate, discomfort) and attempt to resolve these in the event you can.
- Take into consideration the values that matter to you. How might you contribute to these, in a small means, right this moment? How are you going to keep centered on these values when different issues in your life really feel uncontrolled?
- Arrange one a part of your residing area in a means that is smart to your targets. For instance, in the event you’re making an attempt to write down a e book, create a peaceable writing area that will naturally encourage you to sit down down and sort.
- Create wholesome routines to maintain you feeling higher. For instance, consider three easy issues you are able to do within the morning that may begin you off on the precise foot (e.g., ingesting a glass of water, making your mattress, doing a little stretches).
Discover out extra concerning the 4: The Enneagram 4 Individualist
Enneagram 5 and Overwhelm
When Fives first start to expertise stress, they have a tendency to drag away, withdraw, and search for data that may ease their anxiousness. They could obsess over a specific topic of curiosity, strive troubleshooting, or cancel tasks and commitments. Primarily they inform the world to “go away me alone.”
If stress continues and results in a state of overwhelm, Fives could disintegrate to Seven. When this occurs, they change into extra nihilistic, scattered, centered on diversion, pleasure, and pointless leisure. They could make unusually rash choices for his or her sort, behaving in a means that’s extra impulsive and short-sighted than typical.
What Fives Ought to Do As a substitute:
As a substitute of falling right into a scattered, stressed, flurry of exercise and pleasure-seeking, the 5 ought to attempt to combine some wholesome qualities of the Eight. However I’m leaping forward too far right here. As all the time, attempt to get your physique right into a less-charged state. Take some deep breaths, clench and unclench your fists, shake out your limbs and attempt to launch among the pent-up pressure harboring itself in your joints, lungs, muscle tissues, even your abdomen. Punch a pillow if you’ll want to! In case you’re over-stimulated, take a while to be alone and breathe. However don’t change into a hermit! A part of getting true comfort means embracing life and never simply hiding away.
Subsequent, combine some Eight qualities into your life. As a 5 you are usually cautious, sluggish to motion, perfectionistic, obsessive about studying to the purpose the place the “doing” by no means will get began. If you combine some Eight qualities, you change your data to one thing helpful, start to belief your instincts, and develop extra confidence in your talents.
Methods to Cut back Overwhelm and Combine Eight Into Your Life:
- Get exterior and transfer your physique. This might imply exercising, doing a sport, going for a hike, mountaineering. Simply select one thing that will get you extra in tune along with your physique and your bodily instincts.
- Start one thing you’ve been enthusiastic about beginning for a very long time, however have been laying aside.
- Begin and end one small mission
- Assert your wants. As a substitute of isolating in your stress, let somebody who cares understand how you’re feeling and ask for assist.
- Let the world in. Exit in nature and be current with what’s taking place round you, spend time with somebody you care about and easily be current with them.
Discover out extra about Fives: The Enneagram 5 – The Investigator
Enneagram 6 and Overwhelm
When Sixes first expertise stress, they attempt to discover options and methods out. Their minds are likely to buzz with worst-case situations and foresee issues they’ll circumvent. They have an inclination to change into defensive, anxious, and evasive, consumed by making an attempt to repair no matter is inflicting them stress as rapidly as potential.
If stress continues or reaches the purpose of overwhelm, Sixes disintegrate to Three. All of a sudden they change into extra image-conscious; they usually direct their pent-up frustration at others or blame them for points they’re coping with. Throughout these phases they might appear extra harsh, dishonest, or aggressive. An aura of cockiness could come over them or they might merely appear unusually involved with how others view them.
What Sixes Ought to Do As a substitute:
Sixes, when overwhelmed, ought to initially deal with stabilizing their physique and respiration to mitigate the push of tension. Methods corresponding to aware respiration might be profoundly calming. Progressive muscle rest, the place pressure is consciously launched from one space of the physique at a time, ranging from the toes and shifting up, will also be efficient. Moreover, grounding workout routines that join Sixes with the current second, corresponding to noticing 5 issues they’ll see, 4 they’ll contact, three they’ll hear, two they’ll scent, and one they’ll style, assist in diverting the thoughts from spiraling ideas.
As soon as a state of bodily calm is achieved, it’s time to combine some 9 qualities into their lives. Sixes usually have a flurry of ideas and concepts continually buzzing of their thoughts, forcing them right into a state of charged stress. Once they combine some 9 qualities, they change into calmer, extra at peace with what is occurring, and extra open-minded and able to coping with what life is handing them.
Methods to Cut back Overwhelm and Combine 9 Into Your Life:
- Spend time in nature, permitting the inherent peace of the setting to assuage and floor you.
- Check out some meditation or yoga to encourage a state of mindfulness and presence.
- Discover methods to observe acceptance. This may imply connecting along with your internal youngster and having extra understanding that many issues are out of your management. It might probably additionally imply reminding your self that you just’ve overcome sudden struggles up to now or that wrestle and hardship are a part of life, however so is magnificence and pleasure.
- Take into account speaking to a therapist about what you’re going by means of and getting some recommendation or comfort.
- Domesticate some quiet, relaxed time for your self. Learn a e book, take a sizzling bathtub, spend time within the backyard, or simply take a much-needed relaxation.
- Verify in along with your physique to see if there’s something that’s additional amplifying your stress, like starvation, fatigue, or discomfort.
Discover out extra concerning the Six: The Enneagram 6 – The Loyalist
Enneagram 7 and Overwhelm
When Sevens first start to expertise stress, they have a tendency to search for distractions and diversions to maintain the hardship off their thoughts. This might imply taking part in a online game, calling a good friend, going out for a drive, or every other variety of issues.
If stress continues or reaches some extent of overwhelm, Sevens could disintegrate to One. All of a sudden they really feel deeply aware of all of the issues which are flawed of their lives. They see everybody else’s errors, flaws of their setting, and really feel a deep must regain a way of management. Throughout these moments, they might change into immediately conscious of issues about themselves or others which are “flawed” or “evil” and must be fastened. In a frenzy, they’ll attempt to “repair” every part immediately, however usually make issues worse as an alternative.
What Sevens Ought to Do As a substitute:
As a substitute of turning into hyper-fixated on flaws and errors, Ones ought to combine among the 5 enneatype. The pure state of the Seven is to be in fixed movement, exploring, discovering, happening adventures, and making an attempt new issues. They like to remain busy and distracted relatively than trying inward. When Sevens combine 5, they “voyage inside” and really take a look at the reality of what’s happening for them. This implies going through their anxieties and looking for actual data about who they’re and what they want. It means taking a break from the surface world and permitting themselves to ponder and be taught.
Methods to Cut back Overwhelm and Combine 5 Into Your Life:
- If you really feel mentally scattered, harassed, and overwhelmed by errors, take a while to breathe. Respiration workout routines may also help cut back pressure, floor you in your physique, and promote a calmer, extra relaxed state.
- Take time to actually course of your emotions. How do your emotions manifest in your physique? Are you able to identify them? What do you suppose these emotions are attempting to inform you? After totally processing the sensation, let it go, however retain the lesson you discovered from it.
- Observe meditation or mindfulness. If that is new to you, strive guided meditations or utilizing an app like Headspace or Calm.
- Flip off your cellphone, pc, and tv and permit your self to relaxation within the silence. Discover how you are feeling (in all probability impatient). Take into account what’s beneath the impatience and write it down.
- Consider a topic that’s significant to you and take a while to analysis it in-depth, even whenever you begin feeling a bit bored.
Discover out extra about Sevens: The Enneagram 7 – The Fanatic
Enneagram 8 and Overwhelm
When Eights first start to expertise stress, they have a tendency to take motion, search for methods to manage the scenario, and confront the issue head-on. Typically they’re extra offended, confrontational, or blunt throughout this stage.
If stress continues or reaches some extent of overwhelm, Eights are likely to disintegrate to 5. They withdraw, change into sullen, brooding, and distant. Typically they really feel overwhelmed by fears of dropping energy or management of the scenario. Throughout these instances, they could really feel overwhelmed by a way of uncharacteristic powerlessness, which they discover new and alarming. They could frantically attempt to be taught data to attempt to really feel competent sufficient, however usually they really feel unusually incompetent as an alternative.
What Eights Ought to Do As a substitute:
To seek out true comfort when overwhelmed, it’s essential for Eights to work at bringing among the Two into their lives. As a substitute of simply searching for energy, Eights must search for therapeutic, connection, and restoration. The Eight naturally desires to have autonomy, management, and independence from others. However typically they again themselves right into a nook with this, preventing for energy over their very own territory and turning into an increasing number of indifferent from others and their brave nature. By integrating Two, they change into extra really courageous, benevolent, protecting, and productive.
Methods to Cut back Stress and Combine Two Into Your Life:
- Do some breathwork to calm your physique. Breathe deep, in by means of the nostril and out by means of the mouth. Focus in your breath and let go of any pressure or tightness in your physique.
- As a substitute of pushing away emotions of vulnerability and neediness, permit your self to really feel them. Lean into them and see what they’re making an attempt to inform you about your self and others.
- You’re not the form of one that sits round moping, however typically it’s essential to really really feel your grief, losses, and hurts. Attempt to discover why these emotions are there and write them down in a journal.
- Discover somebody you belief and divulge heart’s contents to them about what you’re going by means of. Even when it feels odd or uncomfortable, don’t assume that others don’t need to hear about you. The individuals who have your again WANT to have your again and be somebody you possibly can flip to.
- Look at how steadily you count on individuals to betray or reject you. Many Eights, unknowingly, ship out alerts of rejection to others just because they’re so certain others will reject or betray them. Take a second to succeed in out to somebody you care about and affirm their significance to you.
- Observe stretching and muscle rest workout routines to launch pressure and stress in your physique.
Enneagram 9 and Overwhelm
When Nines start to really feel overwhelmed, their preliminary response is usually to retreat into their internal sanctum of peace and tranquility, hoping the stress will merely dissolve if ignored. This escapism usually manifests in procrastination, numbing out with actions like binge-watching TV, or overindulging in consolation meals. The extra they attempt to keep away from battle and stress, the extra passive-aggressive and disconnected from actuality they change into.
What Nines Ought to Do As a substitute:
Nines ought to try to combine some points of the Three enneatype into their lives. By doing so, they’ll be taught to claim themselves and their wishes extra successfully, whereas additionally discovering the worth in setting and attaining targets. This doesn’t imply Nines must sacrifice their peace-loving nature; relatively, it encourages them to discover a stability between motion and inaction, guaranteeing they’re actively taking part in their very own lives.
One in all my closest relations is a 9, and she or he usually numbs herself to herself. She “vacates the premises” when she’s harassed, denies having wants, and tries to deal with some internal peace she’s cultivated. The issue with that is that it retains her within the aggravating or painful scenario longer when options are there to be grasped. For Nines, it’s essential to observe awakening the self, talking up for your self, and turning into extra assertive and current to who you’re and why your wants matter.
Methods to Cut back Overwhelm and Combine Three Into Your Life:
- Set small, achievable targets every day. Have a good time your victories, irrespective of how minor they might appear, to construct confidence and momentum.
- Interact in bodily exercise to assist reconnect along with your physique and break by means of the numbness. This may be so simple as a each day stroll or a yoga session.
- Converse up about your wants and opinions extra recurrently, even when it’s simply with family and friends at first. Observe asserting your self in secure areas.
- Make investments time in a pastime or talent that pursuits you, one that offers you a way of accomplishment and goal.
- Mirror in your accomplishments and the way they’ve positively impacted your life and the lives of others. Acknowledge that your actions do make a distinction.
Discover out extra about Nines: The Enneagram 9 Baby
What Do You Assume?
How do you deal with overwhelm? Have you ever discovered sure methods simpler than others primarily based in your Enneagram sort? Please share your ideas, insights, and questions within the feedback beneath. We’d love to listen to from you!
References:
The Knowledge of the Enneagram: The Full Information to Psychological and Religious Progress for the 9 Persona Sorts by Don Richard Riso and Russ Hudson (Bantam Books, 1999)
The Enneagram: A Christian Perspective by Richard Rohr and Andreas Ebert (Crossroad Publishing, 2014)
The Enneagram, Relationships and Intimacy by David Daniels, M.D. and Suzanne Dione (David Daniels, M.D., 2018)
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